Old Jokes

I just saw this joke on a mailing list:

This would be akin to the old story about a performer auditioning before a theater manager. The performer floats above the stage under his own power and then flies from one end of the theater to the other. The performer then lands back on the stage. The theater manage asks "do you do anything else other than bird imitations?"

And that reminded me of this one:

Dog Talents

A guy walks into a talent agency with a dog, and says "I've got a great act...my dog can actually talk."

"Surrrre he can," replies the talent agent, "prove it."

So the fellow asks the dog, "What is on top of a building?"

"Roof, roof!" the dog replies.

"What does sandpaper feel like?"

"Rough, rough!" the dog replies.

The talent agent starts to get impatient as the man asks his dog,

"Who was the greatest baseball player of all time?"

"Ruth, Ruth!" says the dog.

Instantly the talent agent throws open the door, and kicks the pair out of his office.

After a few seconds, the dog looks up at his master and says,

"Should I have said DiMaggio?"